I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
