so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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