They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
