Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
