Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
