is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
