Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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