i may or may not be watching the land before time
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Randomize
