So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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