I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
