he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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