hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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