I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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