Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You pole danced in your parka.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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