I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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