I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
there is glitter all over my balls
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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