ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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