he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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