So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
