Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
