everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
