you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
