Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize
