Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
