i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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