I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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