East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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