Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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