drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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