i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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