I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
