I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
