something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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