So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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