Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
