my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
