just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
false alarm, still single
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
