I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
