Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
