FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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