i will never coherently bang her
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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