My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize