seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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