her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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