She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
