i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
