actually, I'm a sock model
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
