I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Randomize
