i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Randomize
