in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
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